


your name is home (and i always find my way back)

by Fiselis



Category: Tokyo Ghoul, 君の名は。| Kimi no Na wa. | Your Name.
Genre: (eventual angst), Angst, Bodyswap, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change, ghouls still exist, this is loosely based on the movie your name bc its got me FUCKED UP
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-01-24 08:15:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18567436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fiselis/pseuds/Fiselis
Summary: As summer comes to a close, a new story begins to unfold.Connected by a single thread of fate, two strangers become intimately close. These strands may fray, or tense, or knot together, but the connections they make are eternal.Sometimes, those threads are willingly snipped.





	1. Reality

Just the sound of heat bugs alone made the the air feel degrees hotter than it actually was. It was oppressive, the sticky humidity and the endless drone of those chattering insects. They were mocking him from above, he could just tell. 

Hideyoshi was exhausted from work. And by “work”, he meant slacking off from studying. His parents had insisted that he worked harder in the summer to better prepare for university. He begrudgingly agreed, as the shadow of college began to loom overhead. Before the anxiety could overwhelm him, his stomach growled. 

Hide sighed, stretching in his chair. He shut his laptop and stood with a loud yawn. Stuffing some cash and his cellphone into his pocket, he threw his shoes on and left the house with a loud “I’ll be back in a bit!” Before either of his fathers could tell him off for slacking, he shut the door behind him. 

If he thought being inside sitting next to his cheap air conditioner was unbearable, stepping outside was torture. 

Not a single cloud in the sky offered any sense of relief. The sun beat heavily on his shoulders, hopefully leaving behind a tan (but more likely a sunburn). He walked leisurely down to the town, following the sloping sidewalk upwards. 

Hide didn’t mind the small town life. Sure, it was rather slow for such a high-speed person like himself, but being able to know the face of every person he walked by was a comforting feeling. He wouldn’t brag by calling himself popular, but he took pride in being liked by most of the people in town. 

He waved to a group of his friends from school, who had called out to him. He wanted to join them on their fun, but he knew he had better things to do.

_ Like getting my life together,  _ he thought bitterly.

But Hide was not a bitter person at all. In fact, he prided himself in being the opposite. He tried his best to always wear a smile, no matter how hard it was.

At the local convenience store, he picked up a can of coffee and a hearty looking sandwich. Maybe it wasn’t the healthiest option, but Hide didn’t really care either way. 

By the time he reached the end of his trek, he was covered in sweat. He honestly felt like dragging the plastic bag of food behind him, and as much as he was into the theatrics, he knew it wasn’t really necessary.

He plopped down on a rock in the shade, spilling the contents of the bag on the forest floor. He didn’t anticipate a picnic today, but he needed to get out of the house. He unwrapped the sandwich, took a massive bite, and sighed in contentedness. 

Life was good.

He cracked open the coffee can, took a sip, and immediately spat it out. It was black, not a single grain of sugar or drop of milk. Tongue sticking out sadly, Hide dumped the coffee onto the ground. Life was a little less good, but whatever.

He didn’t keep track of the time as he scrolled absentmindedly through his social media feed. Nothing was of any interest really, it hardly ever was.

Until he found one particular news article.

A ghoul attack. In Tokyo, of course. 

There was something about ghouls that drew Hide in. Maybe it was the way that they were so well disguised, or that their life was sustained only on the flesh of humans. Which he very much was. It was just a weird interest of his, something he researched on his free time. He liked playing a detective, piecing together parts of a puzzle of murder.

Binge-Eater, a ghoul of the 20th ward was on a rampage again. No one, including the CCG, could understand why this particular ghoul was consuming so much, as ghouls only needed to feed about every month or so. Binge-Eater seemed to have a victim on an almost weekly basis, which was frightening. Did they just do it for the kill, a mindless instinct of survival? Or were they thinking, calculating, each and every person--prey--and how fun it’d be to kill them?

Hide sighed. Despite the danger, deep down he desperately wanted to visit Tokyo. Even just the opportunity to investigate the area for traces of ghouls was so enticing. Maybe he could go there for school, it would finally ease the burden on his shoulders placed by his parents. 

Looking up from his phone, he realized how dark it had gotten. It would also explain why there had been a slight chill in the air, now that the sun had set. His fathers were going to kill him, but at least he had considered his future. That was something, right?

He heaved himself off of the hard stone, and gazed out over the cliff face. The sparkling lake that the town had built itself around seemed to glow in the moonlight, reflecting the thousands of stars overhead. It looked like a piece of the sky had been cut away, placed like a blanket over the earth.

Out of nowhere, Hide’s voice bubbled from his chest, ripping through his throat until he had made himself hoarse. 

“Let me go to Tokyo, let me find a ghoul!”

  
  


\---

  
  


Kaneki hummed absentmindedly as he flipped to the next page of his novel. The cafe was dead aside from himself and one other customer. The TV overhead was playing the news, the same old stuff every day. 

He continued his reading, ignoring the endless drone of the news anchor. He wasn’t really paying attention, focused on the intricate works of Takatsuki Sen, his favorite author. He could care less about the weather or whatever politics were the main focus of the day. 

“ _...Members of the CCG were unable to determine who the victim was before their violent death. It seems as though Binge-Eater, the ghoul often found in the 20th ward, has gone on another rampage. Citizens are advised to…” _

Kaneki looked up from his book.  _ The 20th Ward?  _ That’s where he was. He glanced over at the other customer, seeing if they had had any reaction to the news. His heart hammered as he saw  _ her. _

Rize-san was a regular at Anteiku, the cafe that Kaneki had made a point of visiting as often as possible. At first it had started as a crush, but the coffee was nice too. But Rize was the highlight. She was pretty, but it was her reading that interested Kaneki the most. He sheepishly recalls stopping by the bookstore on his way home one night, interested to see what it was that she had been reading. 

But today was different. Today was--

_ Takatsuki Sen. _

That was his favorite! Heck, he was reading the same book right that moment. His staring was quite obvious, apparently, as Rize glanced upwards, brushing a strand of her lovely purple hair out of her face. Her gaze drifted down to the book in Kaneki’s hand, a small smile tugging at her lips. 

Kaneki’s face reddened as she stood from her table, walking over to his. She smiled softly, and handed him a slip of paper. A string of numbers. A phone number. Kaneki looked up at her in shock, but she was already turning away. He felt a giddy bubble in his chest, rising to the very top. After she had left, he placed some money at his table and booked it. He did, of course, thank the very kind purple-haired waitress that tended to him. 

She watched him leave with a grimace. That damned Rize.

  
  
  
  


The rest of the day passed rather quickly for Kaneki. He hadn’t yet mustered up the courage to text Rize, a list of unsent text messages a very clear indication of that, but he guessed he’d have a little time to plan that part out later. For now, as he tucked himself into his bedsheets, a small sigh left his lips, a string of heartfelt words following close behind. 

“Please give me the confidence to meet with Rize, to impress her!”

  
  


\---

  
  


An unfamiliar alarm woke Hide from his sleep. He reached over to turn his phone off, desiring just a few more moments of sleep, but it wasn’t where he had left it last night. He fumbled with the sheets, feeling his fingers brush his bedside table. A loud  _ Thunk!  _ was the obvious sound of a phone falling to the floor. Grimacing, Hide sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

He picked up the ringing phone from the floor, shutting off the alarm. He flopped back into the bed, attempting to fall back asleep, but something was wrong. Something weird.

These sheets weren’t his. 

Hide’s eyes blinked open, glancing down at the dark sheets of his bed. They were thin, lightweight sheets in a bunch of dark, neutral greys and whites. Where were his overly fluffy comforters? What about his sunflower print sheets?

Hide glanced around the rest of the room, a sinking feeling in his chest. This wasn’t his room. Did he get drunk last night somehow? He didn’t drink, at least not on purpose. Then how did…

Hide got out of bed, drawing back the curtains of the window. His heart stopped for a second as he took in the view.

_ A city… _

Tokyo.

Of course, he didn’t really know too much about what Tokyo looked like aside from Google. But this was a city, and he  _ had  _ just dealt with that whole epiphany last night. Last night…

Aha! So he was dreaming.

Hide chuckled lightly to himself, taking a good look at the room around him. It was kind of drab for his liking, but he couldn’t complain. The real issue was the wardrobe. Why were there so many sweaters? White buttoned shirts and cardigans? Is this how city people dressed? Hide frowned. He wanted to wear his signature obnoxiously vibrant outfits. 

He picked out a reasonable outfit, but they looked a little small hanging up. He threw them on, surprisingly they fit pretty well as though he had lost some weight, and ran a hand through his hair.

No bed head?

His hair was straight, cut short and fell around his face in a simple cut. That was the last straw. Hide searched the room for a mirror, finally finding one in a random drawer he searched in. He looked at his reflection in shock.

He looked… like a huge nerd.

“Agh, what the heck kind of dream is this?!" Hide cried. But it wasn’t his voice, it was softer somehow, more airy than his own. Hide slumped on the floor for a second.

_ I finally get to Tokyo… and I look like a massive nerd,  _ he thought with dismay.  _ How will I pick up a girlfriend looking like this? This isn’t a dream, it’s a nightmare. _

Hide turned to the phone sitting beside him. He opened it, curious, reading through all the unsent texts. Who was Rize? Why hadn’t he sent a single text? Then it dawned on him. He didn’t have to pick up a girl in a dream like this, he already had!

He deleted all the other texts, finding them to be way too formal. Instead, he shot off a quick “ _ Tmrw nite, my place? ;)) _ ”. In the meantime, he was free to explore the city as he wanted. 

Shoving his shoes on, he rushed out the door with only his cellphone and whatever cash was left over in his pocket. The only thing left to make this dream even better was one thing.

A ghoul.

  
  


\---

  
  


Kaneki woke up with a start. His alarm hadn’t gone off, and the fear of sleeping through his morning classes was enough to wake him. He was sweltering, though, the confusion caused by this overshadowing any potential anxiety over the day. 

He got out of bed, blinking blearily over the brightly decorated room.  _ Too bright.  _ He looked around, gasping at the absolute mess of a room. Notebooks were sprawled everywhere, manga face down haphazardly and unfinished. Kaneki grimaced. This wasn’t his room.

He stood up, leaving the room to find the bathroom, but the whole house had changed. It wasn’t the small apartment he was used to, but rather a larger cottage-like home that was overwhelmingly quiet. He actually liked it, feeling warm in the foreign walls surrounding him. 

After a bit of exploring, he found the bathroom with relative ease, running the water as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He stared blankly into the mirror for a moment, blinking slowly as the image before him processed in his brain.

_ He was blonde! _

And a whole lot of other things, actually. All he could tell was that he was not himself, he wasn’t Kaneki Ken anymore. Who the hell was he?  _ Where  _ was he? Was this some sort of sick dream?

Perhaps he was reading too much before bed. 

Kaneki sighed. This was just some weird dream. It happened. He should lay off the books and coffee for now, and focus on more important things. Like Rize. 

He glanced around the room for his phone, which he had usually placed on his bedside table nightly. With a quick shuffle of the bedsheets, his phone fell to the floor. Luckily the screen didn’t get damaged, but the battery was almost dead. It wasn’t like him to fall asleep with it, let alone leaving it unplugged all night long. This dreamlike version of himself was a mess, he wasn’t quite a fan.

The wardrobe was a nightmare, with only neon bright clothes or outrageous patterns. Throwing on the most normal ones he could find, he started to navigate his way through the house.

For a dream, everything felt very real. Even the sweltering heat of the humid summer felt like it was real, and the house didn’t seem to have any air conditioning. A glance outside the window showed that it was a beautiful day, beautiful enough to take a stroll outside. Kaneki couldn’t say no to that feeling, after all, it would be nice to explore this dreamscape.

As he wandered down the streets, a few people stopped to wave at him. He smiled back every time, a small wave of his hand to accompany it. It was nice to see people in such a good mood, this never happened in the city. Tokyo was rarely as pleasant, and the constant thrum of the city was rather obnoxious. He was content, relaxed for the first time in a long time. 

But that wasn’t the case for long.

“Yo, Hideyoshi!” A young man, around Kaneki’s age, called out. Kaneki ignored it, continuing his walk down the street. But that was interrupted by the violent arm that wrapped around his shoulders in a quick motion. Kaneki gasped, flinching away at the contact as he stared at the stranger.

“What’s up man? Didn’t you hear me call for you?” The teenager asked, a large smile on his face. “I hadn’t heard from you all day. Where’ve you been?”

Kaneki stared up at him with furrowed brows. “U-uh, I’m sorry, do I know you?”

"Hide, what’s up with you?” The teenager was still smiling, but his expression betrayed the look of confusion etched into his face. 

“Hide…” Kaneki mumbled to himself. Glancing back upwards, he smiled. “Oh, you must be my friend, then.”

“Is this some sort of prank, Nagachika?! You’re so weird,” the teenager sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “C’mon, did you forget we were hanging out today too?”

Before he could speak, Kaneki was dragged away, wrist forcibly grasped by this stranger who  _ still  _ didn’t give him his name. 

_ What an odd dream.  _

  
  


\---

  
  


Hide got what he wished for.

  
  


\---

  
  


Kaneki awoke fully dressed. 

And  _ exhausted. _

It was as though the dream last night was real, like he really had gone down to the beach for  _ hours  _ to play volleyball with some friends. Except that he didn’t really have friends. And he didn’t know how to play volleyball.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, left uncharged once again. He slid it unlocked, and clicked on the only notification he had. A text, believe it or not, and from Rize. But wait, he hadn’t texted her yet. How could she have his number?

With a surge of panic, Kaneki scrolled up to see their previous conversation. It was even worse than he could have possibly imagined. First it started with an entirely out of character text from  _ him,  _ inviting Rize to his house. She was surprised by his response, but accepted the date. Which meant…

He missed the date.

He quickly texted Rize in a flurry of apologies for missing the date. His heart hammered, mostly out of a mix of embarrassment and anxiety. When the bubbles appeared, indicating that she was typing, it felt like the world had stopped. 

_ Oh? Kaneki-san, we did go on the date yesterday. Did you forget…? _

_ Yesterday? I don’t recall… I’m very sorry, Rize-senpai, but my mind is foggy… _

_ How odd. You did act quite strangely, you were much more...exuberant than I anticipated. You really don’t remember anything? At all? _

_ Not a thing. _

_ Perhaps we can try again sometime, then? _

Kaneki sighed in relief, but then tensed in concern. What did she mean by that? Why did he forget about the date? He gulped, glancing at the calendar on his desk. Then he checked the calendar on his phone.

He had missed an entire day.

Panic once again surging through his veins, Kaneki dashed around the house, picking up the odds and ends strewn about. It wasn’t like him to leave clothes on the floor, let alone a bunch of perfectly clean ones. It was like he went through his  _ entire  _ closet, flinging anything uninteresting onto the floor. It was so unlike him.

Something was off, but he didn’t quite understand what it was. 

Kaneki sighed, returning to his desk. One last glance at his phone informed him that Rize was away for a couple weeks, and that when she returned she would be more than happy to have lunch together. Contented by the response, Kaneki pulled over his book. He flipped open to where his bookmark was tucked inside neatly, skimming the page. It had been written in, but not by his own handwriting.

_ You can’t read in dreams. _

 

\---

  
Hide already knew that it was impossible to read in dreams. It took until yesterday for him to find out that you can also  _ definitely  _ feel pain. 


	2. Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The string of fate loosens slightly, the two ends drawing closer. However, the string once again grows taut once the calm passes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall im DUMB i forgot to post chapter notes on the first chapter lol so i guess ill do the introduction HERE
> 
> ao3 deleted my original typed out response so im gonna simplify it here, this is essentially a bodyswap au based extremely loosely on the movie kimi no na wa (your name), no knowledge about the movie is necessary to read and understand this fic
> 
> to those who commented on the previous chapter, thank you! you helped motivate me to finish this lol

Something was happening, something weird.

 

_ What’s your name? _

 

Every once and awhile, Hide would wake up in a different body. Not a new one each time, the same one. Kaneki Ken’s, a student of Kami University in Tokyo. They were the same age, drastically different, but somehow managed to make their situation work.

 

_ Kaneki Ken.  _

 

The second time it happened, Hide woke with a note taped to his face. In neat handwriting was Kaneki’s name, a bit of information about himself, and some things about his life. To make it easy the next time the two switched. Hide smiled at the note, it was written so professionally.

 

_ I’m Hideyoshi Nagachika, call me Hide! _

 

It seemed that, whenever they went to sleep, the had the potential ability to switch their bodies. When Hide rolled out of bed, recognizing that it was his own, he was honestly relieved. Playing pretend as someone else is fun, except when you're playing pretend  _ for real _ . Did that make sense? Hide really didn’t care.

 

_ Nice to meet you, Hide. _

 

Despite some complications due to their vastly different personalities, Kaneki and Hide managed to make their situation work for the both of them. Kaneki was very academic and quiet, and helped Hide tremendously with his schoolwork. On the other hand, Hide helped Kaneki stick up for himself and be more confident. 

 

After awhile, despite never meeting face to face, they became something like friends.

 

Until, eventually, Hide set out to change that.

  
  
  


  
The day was like any other. Hide woke up in his own body nice and early, thanks to Kaneki’s alarm. He had a mission, something he felt that he  _ needed  _ to do. Whether it was because he truthfully wanted to, or if it was something like fate, Hide knew he had to go to Tokyo.

 

Hide packed a bag, grabbed his headphones, and set off. The train left every two hours, so he had to rush to catch the earliest one. By the time he had gotten there, the heat had made his hair frizzier than usual, sticking out every which way. He tried his best to tame it, but it was unavoidable.

 

The trip went by rather quickly, mostly thanks to the blaring music in Hide’s ears. The train had finally reached the station, Hide immediately jumping off and dashing to his destination. He knew exactly where he needed to go, taking advantage of his prior planning through the use of Kaneki. Eventually, he found exactly where he needed to be.

 

The cafe was small, but in a cozy way. The scent of coffee filled the room, almost making him sleepy. He ordered a small cappuccino and a pastry, stuffing the latter into his mouth before Kaneki arrived.  _ If  _ he arrived.

 

“Are you waiting for someone?” The waitress, a purple haired girl about his age, came over to his table. She picked up the plate, wiping the crumbs off the table.

 

“Oh, yeah, a friend of mine. He comes here sometimes,” Hide scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “We were supposed to meet here, but it was more of a spur of the moment thing.”

 

The girl-- her name tag read “Touka”-- raised an eyebrow. She returned to the counter before bringing another pastry over. Before Hide could protest, Touka raised a hand.

 

“Just be quiet. It’s on the house,” Touka’s frown quirked upwards, into a smirk. “Besides, Anteiku has a policy about guys getting stood-up by their girlfriends.”

 

Hide almost spits out the pastry. “Huh?! I’m not being stood-up, besides, Kaneki is a  _ guy _ , he can’t be my--”

 

“Kaneki?” Touka stops, turning to look at him in surprise. “You know him?”

 

Hide raised an eyebrow. “Sort of?”

 

“You’re his friend, right?” Touka stormed over, slamming her towel onto his table. “Tell him to stop hanging out with that damned Rize. You’d think he’d learn after she--”

 

“H-Hide?”

 

The shop fell silent. Kaneki stood in the doorway, his cheeks a bit red as he saw Hide sitting at the table, awestruck. “You really came, huh?”

 

“Let me know if there’s anything I can get you,” Touka interrupted. She stood straighter, brushing her apron free from wrinkles. Lowly, just so Hide could hear, she added, “Don’t forget what I told you.”

 

Touka left the two alone, only coming by to take their orders. Otherwise, she kept to herself and the other customers, occasionally glancing at the two boys from a distance. It was like she had expected Kaneki to collapse at any second.

 

“This is… unexpected?” Kaneki finally started, awkwardly breaking the overwhelming silence between them. It was so odd for Hide to be this quiet, but for the first time in a long time, he didn’t know what to say.

 

“Y-yeah, it was, huh?” Hide cracked an embarrassed smile, lightly scratching his chin. “Well I figured it’d be a good idea to, y’know, meet while in our own bodies. Get to know each other. Jeez, it feels like we’re on a date or something.”

 

Kaneki smiled. He lifted his mug of coffee to his lips, hiding his face as well as his embarrassment. He didn’t do a very good job—Hide immediately noticed. 

 

“Hey, why don’t we talk about our interests? You like to read, right?” Hide waved his hand, trying to deflect the awkwardness he had brought upon them. At the mention of books, Kaneki became interested. 

 

“Oh, yeah. I really liked to read all sorts of books, all genres interest me, but I’ve always been a big fan of Takatsuki Sen. The artistry behind each and every word paints a beautiful picture in one's mind,” Kaneki paused, his eyes clouding over before jilting back to the present. His cheeks reddened again. “I-I’m sorry for rambling.”

 

Hide’s heart pounded. “No, no! It’s okay. I wanna know more about you, man.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Of course,” Hide said. “It’s what friends do, right?”

 

Kaneki pursed his lips, looking away sheepishly. “Not that I’d know, exactly.”

 

Hide, without thinking, slammed his hand into Kaneki’s shoulder, who nearly fell out of his chair in surprise. “Everyone needs friends! Y’know, rabbits die when they’re alone, yeah? And I don’t want you to die, so from now on you aren’t alone!”

 

Kaneki furrowed his brows. “H-Hide, I don’t—“

 

“You’re my friend now. Actually, you’re my  _ best  _ friend now. Sorry, but I don’t make the rules here,” Hide leaned back into his chair, crossing his arms in an attempt to seem cool. Which he wasn’t. Not in that moment, at least. 

 

Kaneki  _ laughed.  _

 

“Alright, then. But that means you’ll have to teach me what best friends do, yes?” Kaneki smiled, stirring his coffee slowly. 

 

Hide jumped out of his seat, left a pile of cash and change on the table before starting towards the door. “In that case, your lesson starts  _ now! _ The day isn’t gonna wait for us, Ken!”

 

\---

 

The day was  _ spectacular.  _ For the both of them. 

 

Kaneki watched as Hide kicked loose pebbles as they walked, watched him mess with his frizzy hair. The way that Hide’s mouth always quirked into a warm smile every time he caught Kaneki’s glance. Kaneki would’ve wanted to crawl in a hole and die if it were anyone else, but he felt comfortable around Hide. Warm.  _ Safe.  _

 

It was probably weird for Kaneki to immediately feel so drawn to someone he had only just met, but he also felt like he knew Hide better than anyone else. They had swapped bodies after all, and it wasn’t like he  _ hadn’t  _ been a bit curious. Before he could think any further in on it, he pushed away his thoughts. 

 

Time passed as they walked, eventually Kaneki had pointed out a bookstore, shyly admitting his interest. Before he could finish requesting that they check it out, Hide was already dragging him inside by the wrist. 

 

They left with a small bag with a couple books, both of which were Kaneki’s. Hide admitted he wasn’t a huge fan of reading, aside from the occasional manga here and there. 

 

“The news, actually,” Hide pointed out. “I like to do research and read articles about the news.”

 

Kaneki raised an eyebrow. “You mean stuff like politics? You don’t really seem to be that sort.”

 

“Nah,” Hide mumbled his response, his exterior suddenly growing cold. “Ghouls.”

 

“Oh.”

 

Hide didn’t speak for a moment as they continued to walk, lost in thought with his eyebrows knitted together. Eventually, when he did speak, Kaneki had almost already forgotten he had been there. 

 

“You know that girl, Rize?” Hide questioned. “Purple hair?”

 

“Of course,” Kaneki said. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing, just…” He trailed off, trying to determine how best to approach the subject. He didn’t want to tell him that his only romantic interest was a  _ ghoul.  _ Or that she had tried to  _ eat him _ . “I would watch out for her. She doesn’t seem like the right person for you.”

 

“Is that so,” Kaneki mused. “And what kind of person  _ is  _ for me?”

 

Hide shoved his hands into his pockets. He hummed, thinking for a moment. “I dunno, someone genuine. Someone who cares about you, respects who you are. Someone who gets you out of your comfort zone, but still supports you. Y’know?”

 

The two made eye contact for a split second, before Kaneki murmured a hoarse “yeah”. 

 

That awkward moment aside, the two continued their “friendship lesson” rather uneventfully. They stopped for dinner at a local restaurant, continued to share more about themselves in rather excruciating detail. But, when you occasionally swap bodies a couple times a week, what’s the point in hiding anything? 

 

Hide was in the middle of some outrageous story while Kaneki glanced around the street. People walked with their children, held hands with their partners, all while chatting and laughing. When he returned his gaze back to Hide, the blonde returned the stare with a curious look. He let his eyes shift to the couple holding hands, then back to Kaneki once more. 

 

Without warning, Hide stepped forward, grabbing Kaneki’s hand in his own. Before Kaneki could blurt out his surprise, he was dragged towards a small alleyway. For a split second, Kaneki realized how stupid his situation was. He just dumped all of his pent up history and emotions onto this  _ complete  _ stranger, who knows where he  _ lives,  _ and now he's being brought down an alley. He was going to die like this.

 

But then he didn’t.

 

The alleyway lead to a small, private park. As the sun had begun to set, a warm golden glow illuminated the park in a welcoming light. The trees that lined the courtyard showed signs of fall, the once-green leaves already turning a brilliant shade of yellow.

 

Amongst the autumnal oasis that was this tiny park, Hide fit in better than he could have ever imagined. Even despite his outrageously bright outfit, his head of bleached blonde hair, or even the warm, freckled skin of his face, Hide  _ belonged.  _ He was the sunflower in the center of the park.

 

“So what do you think?” Hide’s voice was softer than usual, but it still was a surprise to hear it. Kaneki was a bit flustered, tearing his thoughts of Hide out of his mind. “I found it on one of my explorations as, well, you. So technically you’ve been here already, but--”

 

“I love it.” Kaneki was staring at Hide. The two held the glance for a second, until Hide eventually broke it with a smirk. 

 

Hide plopped down into one of the benches, rubbing at his sore calves. Kaneki sat down next to him, tucking his bag close to his chest. He checked his watch, startled at the time, and tugged at Hide’s sleeve. 

 

“Hey, don’t you live far away? You’re going to miss your train back,” Kaneki said, his voice edged in concern. 

 

Hide shrugged. “I’ll just wait for the morning one, not a big deal.” 

 

Kaneki hesitated for a second, opening his mouth before shutting it once again. When he finally did speak, his voice wavered slightly. “M-maybe you could… stay at my place?”

 

“Sure! If you don’t mind,” Hide said, a big grin on his face. Kaneki seemed like he was putting effort into opening up to Hide, and he was proud to say that it was partially his doing. 

 

“It’s not a problem at all,” Kaneki smiled softly, standing up while holding his bag. Hide followed suit, picking his stuff up off the bench and walking in step with Kaneki.

 

The night brought a cool chill to the air, however the blinding lights of the city made it feel as though the sun had never set. It was like it was always daytime here, and Hide loved the feeling. Maybe it was for the better-- the bright advertisements and streetlights banished every shadow. 

 

And everything lurking within them. 

  
  


\---

 

There was something awkward about welcoming someone into your apartment, especially when they occasionally lived there  _ in your body.  _

 

“I’d show you around, but I assume you already know your way around?” Kaneki led the way into the apartment, leaving his bag on a counter. 

 

“Yeah, I’ll just take the couch,” Hide let himself drop into the rather firm cushions, but eased into a more comfortable position. 

 

Kaneki hovered shyly in the doorway, watching Hide get himself comfortable. Hide caught his glance out of the corner of his eye, but Kaneki quickly turned away. “You can use the bed if that would be more comfortable for you.”

 

“Your bed?” Hide asked, slightly incredulously.

 

“N-no!” Kaneki waved his hands in embarrassment. “The empty… the guest bedroom.”

 

Kaneki felt his face burn as Hide regarded him, taking a split second to think over the offer before politely declining. He didn’t press him as to why, and instead uttered a small goodnight.

 

“Goodnight, Ken,” Hide smiled, wiggling his way deeper into the cushions. “Thanks for today, I hope you had fun.”

 

“More than I ever have,” Kaneki smiled. A real, genuine one. “Thanks for being my friend.”

  
  
  
  


There was an ache in Kaneki’s chest when he woke up the next morning. He was used to being alone, he thought that he enjoyed it even. But staring at the small slip of paper tucked neatly where Hide had slept the night before had made him realize something. He  _ didn’t  _ like being alone. 

 

Kaneki felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He had gotten a text from Rize, asking about their second date. The note forgotten, Kaneki immediately was absorbed into his phone. His heart hammered in excitement, even with Hide gone he still didn’t have to be alone. He quickly responded back, offering to get coffee that afternoon. She accepted, and the date was set.

 

He spent the morning milling about the apartment, taking a shower and picking which clothes to wear. He needed to impress Rize for a  _ second  _ time, despite not remembering a thing about the first. He hoped he--meaning Hide--didn’t do anything to embarrass himself the last time.

 

The date passed by rather quickly, he enjoyed the time they had spent together. They took their time drinking their coffee. Afterwards, a trip to the bookstore helped them get hungry for dinner. It was only then, as they walked past the very same park he and Hide had been just a day before, that he had completely copied everything the two had done yesterday.

 

As Rize walked with her bag in front of her, she hesitated. “Ah, Kaneki? I don’t want to bother you…”

 

“Oh?” Kaneki stopped, turning to face her. “What’s wrong?”

 

“I have to be honest with you, I really don’t feel too well tonight,” Rize tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “I’d walk home, but after the recent ghoul attacks…”

 

“Oh! Allow me to walk you home, then!” Kaneki offered, his face a bit warm at his excitement. 

 

“You wouldn’t mind?” 

 

Kaneki shook his head. “Not at all.”

 

Rize smiled, stepping behind Kaneki as he led the way with faked confidence. Eventually, the streets became less and less crowded until eventually they were the only ones. The streetlights glimmered to life as they maneuvered the shadowy sidewalk. The only sound Kaneki could hear was the clack of Rize’s heels against the pavement.

 

And then they stopped.

 

“Rize?” Kaneki turned around. Rize stood with her head hung, her bag falling to the ground by her feet. 

 

“You know, Kaneki,” Rize lifted her head, but her face was different. Her expression was contorted in some sort of mixture of crazed excitement, but that wasn’t the worst of it. Her eyes had become an inky black, with a brilliant glow of red where her irises were. Black veins webbed across her cheekbones, a haunting image that caused Kaneki to freeze in fear. “You had a completely different expression the last time you saw me like this. I think I like this one more.”

 

Without any warning, large blood-red tentacles erupted from her back, the force launching her at Kaneki with outstretched arms. Kaneki couldn’t move. He couldn’t feel anything. Nothing, everything was numb except--

 

His neck erupted in fiery hot pain, agony ripping through the muscles of his chest like molten lava through his veins. Rize was biting into him, a chuckle rumbling at the very back of her throat. The blood that filled her mouth gurgled and spilled over his shirt, an unsightly amount that made him nauseous. 

 

His head was spinning, his eyesight fading. The panic that consumed him drifted away as his consciousness did as well. He couldn’t think. One second they were on the street, then up. A rooftop? He couldn't tell. It didn’t matter. 

 

“I’ll start with scrambling your insides,” Rize cackled, limp as her tentacles kept her aloft. “Then I’ll slurp them down like you humans do with noodles. Right, Kaneki Ken?”

 

Kaneki couldn’t respond. He was dead. He was dead.

 

“Oh, no,” Rize’s voice was louder now, closer. “Did you die already? Aw, I like to have them struggle as I eat. Oh well, I should eat before you get cold.”

 

He was dead he was dead he was dead--

 

“ _ Itadakimasu~” _

 

A groan of metal.

 

“Huh--”

 

A break.

 

“What--”

 

A crash.

 

Silence.

 

He wasn’t dead. But he couldn’t say that he was alive, either. Only barely.

 

\---

 

Hide opened his eyes to blaring white light, cold and unwelcoming. He couldn’t move. He closed his eyes.

 

The next time he opened them, he was in his room, warm and homey. He could hear his fathers calling him for breakfast. Which could only mean--

 

Kaneki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi back again boyes
> 
> just wanted to add, my goal for this fic is to have a real life posting schedule. ikr, crazy. my goal is to post every monday, which as you can see by my posting date i have already FAILED, but since finals are coming up i cannot guarantee anything.
> 
> in addition to this, i've already drafted quite a few chapters ahead, as well as the main storyline. hopefully that should keep me on schedule lol
> 
> lastly, i apologize if the pacing is off. we're going to get to the good stuff soon, and by good stuff basically the stuff thats going to actually interest me to write lmao. anywho, i hope you enjoyed, kudos and comments help tremendously ! :3c


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